Tuesday, September 15, 2009

The White Tissue!

Alright, so the other day I needed to desperately get out of my house for a little mommy time and you know what that means, grocery store!!! Yes, the grocery store is my retreat, my vacation home when I need to hide:) I love a warm late time summer drive alone, after dusk, still light enough to see out, people have been there and gone, you know around 8:00 or so at the Grocery Store kind of night! It's my library, my field trip, my joy!!! Oh, Ok, I trailed off, sorry, so I decided to extend my little trip, kick up my shoes, live a little and hang out in my car in the parking lot at Krogers and talk on the phone with my girl Ms. R (I'm giving her anonymity here:)
As, I'm sitting there having an in-depth conversation, I notice this average normal looking Michael Brady type of guy walking through the parking lot. He looked just like that photo above on the right, thick wavy hair, navy blue dickies, oxford shirt, this man was clean as a whistle! When all of sudden right in front of me he stops, stares at the ground, picks up a crumpled piece of White Tissue, cleans his nose and proceeds to open it and wipe his brow and chin.....
(I did not shoot this photo I found it on the web and it is exactly what I witnessed!)

I thought (prayed) any minute that Alan Funt of Candid Camera (for you younger folks this ole' television show was like today's Punk'd:) was going to run over to my car and say "Smile your on Candid Camera!"

No one came..... to rescue me from the nastiness I just witnessed! I whispered on the phone to Ms. R, hoping the Brady man didn't hear me or see me and she whispers back, "What, OMG oh no what's he doing now?" I was to scared to speak, I had my camera and for the first time I was to afraid to snap a picture of this simple ordinary man. Matter of fact I lowered myself in my seat because I didn't know what demonic demon had crawled inside this mans head and I sure, as all get out, didn't want him to remotely catch me looking at him!

As he walked off looking like any other normal parking lot person, my mind instantly tried to ration out what I'd just seen, I said to myself, "Maybe he dropped that tissue earlier remembered it, needed it and picked up?"

Well, the visual is now permanently stamped forever in my head, I will never look at discarded piece of white tissue the same again!

This is one of those just thought I'd share stories, but, I will ask this one question.
Have any of you ever witnessed strange behavior from seemingly normal people?


Sandy Fights Fat and Blogs About Nothing said...

Hehe, it's now permanently etched in my brain too...your description is very vivid!

Thanks so much for your words this morning, if I knew your email addy I would have sent a personal note! (Not so subtle hint...wink, wink)

(((((((Ms. Wanda)))))))))

~ Sandy

KC Mom said...

Girl, you see the craziest things!! I would have been waiting for candid camera to jump out too.
Really, someone would do that?? Crazy!

Janelle said...

I certainly hope you're right and it was one he dropped earlier, but I doubt it. Maybe he's just trying to keep the world "green" and doing his recycling part??!!

rebecca said...

Have I ever witnessed strange behavior from seemingly normal people? Yes, yes, yes! I used to work for a man whose workers got a kick of spitting their chewed gum on his office floor. He would then pick it up and put it in his mouth and proceed to chew with much gusto. Yes. Much worse than this man you just witnessed. Isn't that the most disgusting thing you've ever heard? What kind of moron/lunatic does that anyway?

Anonymous said...

Wonderful way in which we are recycling . . .teehee . . .The only thing I have ever seen is my own daughter pick up a piece of chewed gum off the street and chew it . . I was mortified . . but she is fine today and I guess none the worse . . .at least you had some "ShowTime" while you were on your marvelous field trip . . . people do make the best entertainment . . .and that's showbiz . . ..teehee N

Anonymous said...

Honey…have I got some stories for you!


MOMSWEB said...

I don't see what the big deal is. This man has obviously read your blog and saw the post about EXCESSIVE toilet tissue use in your home, so he didn't want to waste any in front of you! Wanda, you didn't know this? Girl, it's obvious to me! LOL!

Missy said...

I too, often use the grocery store as my mom's night out. LOL

That tissue things is just gross.

Stopping in from SITS.

A. Spence said...


My mom's night out is Office Depot...something about office supplies does it for me.

KK said...

Oh dear, that's gross!

Unknown Mami said...

That story made me gag.

I caught a woman eating out of my kitchen garbage. It was like an episode of Seinfeld.

Good to hear from you. I've missed you.

QueenBee said...

I witness strange behavior from normal people on a daily basis. I have teenagers. Enough said.

Anonymous said...

Dearest Wanda,

Don't you realize that there are so few Normal people left in the world??? Pay ATTENTION

the crazy psychos are everywhere.
Ms. Debbie

Grand Pooba said...

Ewwww! Even if he had dropped the tissue earlier, it's still gross that he picked it back up again. He doesn't know what has happened to it in the time he left it until the time he picked it up again!


I've caught tons of people picking their nose, but I don't think that's very strange behavior since EVERYONE seems to do it in their car!

JennyMac said...

you should seriously be a reporter...you see some crazy shenanigans.

Anonymous said...

Diddo what JennyMac said. Ewwwwww, the horror!


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